I had a total “working mom on the verge” moment yesterday. I was plowing through work before I unplugged for a live meeting (meaning I had to be showered and dressed professionally, no hiding behind the laptop!) when the babysitter messaged me saying she had a family emergency and couldn’t come. Working mom guilt kicked in…
The little voices (well, mine are actually quite loud just like I am!) started buzzing:
Should I tell the board I can’t make the meeting?
Do I ask if I can bring my daughter?
If they say ok, is the iPad charged so she will have something to do and not distract from the meeting?
After a moment of panic and downing a glass of wine (Ok, ok….I didn’t have any wine, but that made it all sound movie-ish dramatic didn’t it!?!) I realized that I was making my issue an issue and it didn’t need to be an issue.
The question buzzing stopped when my wild web woman voice screamed over my inner questioning:
YOU DON’T HAVE TO APOLOGIZE FOR BEING A WORKING MOM!!
Silence. Peace. Clarity.
Attending the meeting with my kiddo would be better than not going at all. And I didn’t have to ask permission to bring my child, I would just bring her. I told my daughter the “great news” that we were going to a meeting and that she got to come (…it’s all about spin moms!) and that she would get to watch a show on the iPad (which is a big treat since we have no TV and media is super limited…thank gawad the iPad charged!).
We walked into the meeting and I told everyone in assertive voice (not passive, not aggressive) that the sitter cancelled at the last minute and said my daughter would be watching a show (with headphones on) while we met. Nobody rolled an eye, nobody said a negative thing and everybody was super sweet to her. It all went ok because I was ok with the situation.
Women need to stop apologizing, feeling guilty and making issues an issue. When I took the fear, anxiety and “what will people think/say?” out of the mix and got to the facts, the “what to do?” became clear.
Working moms work HARD, often harder than we realize. We can’t apologize. We just need to keep on keeping on!
Here’s to owning your happy, your healthy and your wealthy lives!